


More Than Twist In My Sobriety

by katane (read2day)



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-06
Updated: 2014-02-06
Packaged: 2018-01-11 10:11:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1171823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/read2day/pseuds/katane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A beach, a ball, that sort of thing<br/>(written sometime around the original broadcast of the series)</p>
            </blockquote>





	More Than Twist In My Sobriety

A ball bounced slowly down, its red colour dull against the sunwashed brilliance of the whitewash on the walls. Chakotay picked his way down after the ball, his pace measured on the narrow stone steps cut from the walls. The harsh sunlight threw his face into relief, all angles in echoes of the lines slashing across his forehead in a sunburst of blue.

He reached the bottom of the steps and retrieved the ball, throwing it back over the wall, then turned to step back up. He paused, a foot on the first step, as he glanced around. In the distance he saw the figure he'd been looking for whilst trying to keep his attention on the volleyball game in progress on the terrace above. He left the steps - no-one was going to miss him for a while yet.

The sand shifted under his feet as he walked; he could feel the grains flowing and drifting with each step, and behind him lay a trail softening as the sand smoothed itself over. He stumbled slightly, then slowed his pace to match the unhurried day. The sun burnt overhead, the sky and sea each a violet blue. Chakotay's gaze wandered along the horizon, where the sun and sea shimmered into one, and returned to the beach. 'Only on the holodeck' he mused to himself, looking at the sweeping expanse of white sand, empty but for a figure in the distance. Had he ever seen Spain this empty? Probably not. It had been popular for centuries, and he doubted whether any beach there had ever been this empty on a summer's day, even here on the northern coast just above Portugal. He finally looked at the silhouette his steps were leading towards, still far away. She sat on a rock, looking out to sea. At this distance, all he could see was her outline.

He was some distance away from the terrace now, the sounds of the game lost, and all he could hear was the mumble of the ebbing tide on the beach and the whisper of the breeze riffling his hair. The air felt fresh, for all that it was recycled through the ship's systems, cleaned by the sun sparkling on the water. Chakotay breathed deeply, his mind clearing slightly and brushed away the question that surfaced. 'What am I doing?' He knew the answer, on all levels - including those he chose not to acknowledge until she allowed him to.

The sand announced his arrival, the murmur of the settling grain just audible. She stiffened slightly, taking a short breath, but didn't move to look at him. He stood a step back from her, and just allowed himself to watch. She knew he was there, and he was patient.

She was sitting, curled, with her chin on her knees, her hands loosely clasped around her legs. The sun lit her hair as it escaped from the clip that held it to her nape, quivering in the breeze. Chakotay stifled an urge to smooth it down her back, to bury his hands in the sunlight, as she finally turned her head towards him. Unexpectedly, she said nothing but simply offered him a hand. He took it. She tugged gently until he stood next to her and held his hand as she looked back at the water and watched ... what she watched he wasn't sure, but he thought perhaps it wasn't this ocean, or even this day.

His thumb rubbed gently at the base of her palm, an unconscious movement as he simply let the moment, the freedom wash through him. She looked down at their hands, a half smile on her lips, then back to him. Finally, he spoke.

'Kathryn.'

Her name. The words that were supposed to follow faded as her smile grew. Peaceful. He lost himself in the peace, the tranquillity of the smile, and wondered at the paths of her thoughts.

'I wondered how long it would be before you found me.'

Her voice cracked slightly, rusty as though she hadn't spoken for hours. Perhaps she hadn't. He looked at her and wondered whether she was pleased he had found her, or whether her smile was for something else.

'Both.'

Her smile quirked with amusement at the look on his face as he realised he'd spoken aloud, and he reddened slightly under the tan. Kathryn let her fingers slip from his and traced a path up his arm, the warmth of the sun lingering on his skin and heating her palm. She let her hand rest on his shoulder as she turned to face him, her eyes meeting level with his for once, as she sat on the rock. Chakotay stood, a little bewildered, then turned his head slowly to place a kiss on her knuckles. He looked back warily, wondering whether he'd pushed too far. The spell held, and her eyes sparkled.

'I can breathe here,' she whispered 'for the first time in far too long, I can breathe.' Chakotay found himself watching her mouth as she spoke, her words rising just above the breeze. She smiled again, and spoke again. This time, the whisper was lost in the air between them and Chakotay blinked. The words he thought he saw her speak ...? She nodded a little at his look of disbelief and suddenly he laughed. So that was how it was to be. Very well, he would settle for that. For now. He mouthed the words back to her, drawing closer. She inhaled sharply and looked briefly over his shoulder. He turned his head. In the far distance, the terrace was empty. Only a red ball remained, rolling in a corner.

Chakotay closed the distance between them as she drew her attention back to him. In truth, it hadn't wandered very far. Her arms looped around his neck as he stood against the rock, his hands flat on the stone on either side of her.

'So you can say it, but you don't want anyone to hear it, hmm? Anyone?'

She nodded.

'Can you tell me why? Why now?' he asked.

Her eyes closed as she considered the question, and her head bowed until their foreheads touched. She looked at the shadows between them.

'No.' A pause. 'I don't know. I can't promise that it'll still be different in the harsher light of the corridors and the bridge but,here and now, I can't hide. I won't hide!' Her voice changed, grew a little grittier with the exclamation, then softened. 'I'm so tired of hiding. This is reality, for all that it's a holodeck. Let it be real.'

He hugged her to him, whispering assurances in her ear too soft to be understood but soothing her agitation, and his. Kathryn's arms tightened around him with the intrusion of the parameters of the relationship then relaxed, releasing them. She would worry about whether they needed to be retrieved later. She tilted her head, then kissed him, a fleeting brush of sunwarmed lips. Chakotay closed his eyes, a sharp breath tightening their embrace further, then blindly sought her mouth.

He could taste the salt on her, the sea air lending a tang even here, as he kissed then sucked gently on her lower lip. Kathryn sighed and leant into the kiss. She'd started it, now she wanted to see if he would take it. He did, gently nudging her lips apart, tasting her and chuckling softly as she slid her tongue against his. He sucked gently, his mouth sliding from hers, and released her. He trailed butterfly kisses along her jaw to her neck as her hands began to explore his shoulders, pushing under the collar of the loose shirt he wore and sliding over the muscles as she came round to his chest. He started as her fingers trailed over a nipple, then nipped at her neck, just below her ear.

Chakotay drew away a little, his hands sliding forwards around her waist. He looked at her, waiting for her eyes to meet his. She smoothed her hands over the muscles of his chest and stomach before looking up. She held his gaze until he realised she'd stopped touching him and was, instead, flicking open the buttons of the dress she wore. As his fingers took over the task, trailing fire against her skin as he worked his way down, Kathryn pushed his shirt back off his shoulders. She leant forwards and kissed the warmth she'd uncovered, savouring the taste and scent of him - all sun and cinnamon and something more. Chakotay reached the last button and slipped the dress from her, letting it pool in her shadow on the rock. Kathryn shivered at the kiss of air on her skin and he hugged her closer.

She laid her head against his shoulder, her hands tracing patterns on his back as they finally met. Chakotay shuddered at the touch of her skin against his, finally. Her breasts pillowed against his chest, cool from the shade of her dress contrasted against the warmth of sun and exercise. He breathed in, burying his face in her hair, as he struggled to retain a measure of control. His efforts failed as he realised he could feel Kathryn's heartbeat against his and he dragged himself away just enough to shed the shirt. As he shrugged it off, Kathryn's fingers unbuttoned the trousers he wore.

Kathryn smiled slightly through a haze of arousal as he nudged her fingers away. He kicked away the trousers and stood before her, flushed with arousal and self-consciousness. She pretended not to notice the self-consciousness - it made it easier to ignore her own - and reached out to curl her fingers around his length.

'Ahhh ...' he gasped, the first sound either had made for a while. It startled them, breaking the rhythm of the sea and their pulses that they had slipped into. Kathryn's smile widened as she looked at him, watching his eyes dilate as she slid her hand along him. He seemed frozen, torn between desire and disbelief as dreams dawned in his eyes. The heat she saw there shivered through her and she took one of his hands, raising it to cup her breast. At the touch of skin under his fingers Chakotay seemed to awake. He gently curved his fingers around the weight and rubbed his thumb across the nipple. He smiled as it tautened, then kissed the puckered nub. Kathryn's hand flexed around him at the touch of his tongue and he bit gently in retaliation.

'God ...' she murmured, her head thrown back. Chakotay grew bolder,his fingers stealing under the lace at her hips to dip along the crease at the top of her thigh, his mouth still dancing attendance on her breasts. Kathryn shifted slightly, restlessly, until he finally skimmed the pads of his fingers against her, trailing a little moisture as he lifted his hand clear to tug at the panties she still wore. She lifted her hips to let him slide them from her, then pushed them clear of her legs. Now he let his kisses wander lower, over her stomach, as Kathryn curled her fingers over his head, running her hands through his hair, clenching as he reached his goal and lapped ather. She let her legs shift open, to give him access.

'Now ...'

'Hmm ...?'

'Now.'

'Now?' he teased.

'Ye-ess.' Kathryn's voice cracked as Chakotay straightened and his erection nudged against her.

'Are you sure?' he asked, suddenly serious. Kathryn looked at him, held his gaze, then nodded.

'Completely' she said, ending with a gasp as he pushed into her. Chakotay stilled, waited for her to adjust to him, one arm holding her against him, the other stroking against the skin of her thigh as they looked down. He shifted again and they both shuddered as they watched him slide into her. Kathryn tipped her head back, the sight of them merged together bringing her almost to climax. Chakotay kissed the length of her neck as he began to move against her, trying to hold back, to find a steady rhythm. His intentions dissolved as Kathryn thrust gently against him and leaned forward to kiss him. A moment later she cried out and he moaned into her mouth, their rhythm cascading into sharp thrusts as Kathryn clenched around him. The sun exploded around them, the sounds of the beach retreating into a thunder of heartbeats.

Kathryn stirred, moving her arms down from Chakotay's shoulders as she tried to restore the circulation that seemed to have been lost. How long had they stood like this, joined, she sitting on the rock and he standing against her? She wasn't sure. Ultimately, she didn't really care right now, either. Chakotay looked at her, his arms caressing her as he slowly surfaced. He kissed her softly, his mouth shaping against hers the words they'd lost on the breeze earlier that afternoon. Kathryn sighed and laid her head on his shoulder. The air stirred against his ear as she repeated those words. This time he felt them, rather than saw them. His embrace tightened, then he slid from her. He cleared his throat, not sure whether he trusted his voice to work.

'Shall we swim?'

Kathryn blinked, then realised what he was offering. She smiled at his courtesy and took his hand as he led her to the water. He washed her carefully, the salt water stinging a little as his gestures repeated the words they'd exchanged in silence.

The sun set, a dull red ball drifting slowly downwards, as Kathryn sat in Chakotay's embrace at the water's edge. Tranquil transparency of emotions for the first time. Perhaps not the last.


End file.
